Thursday, September 27, 2012

Bad day rant


I am having a really bad, no good, terrible kind of day. Okay, it’s actually not that bad – I have buckets to be grateful for and nothing has actually gone wrong.

Yet I just feel so “bleh” and dejected. What’s up with that?

The most interesting part is that I don’t care to make myself feel better. I could rattle off a million things I could do that would put me in a better frame of mind. I have all sorts of coaching tips and tricks to knock me over the doldrums fence. And I have prayers galore that would instantly raise my spirits. But I’m not interested. I am such a happy, up, all is great-all the time kind of gal that I’m finding some strange satisfaction in being unhappy. Now really, what is up with THAT?

Maybe it’s actually an act of compassion. Because I am usually so positive myself, perhaps it is sometimes difficult to relate to others that were born with a more pessimistic (or as they would likely say, reality-driven) streak.

Maybe it’s an act of surrender. If God and the stars and nature and whatever other voodoo-jou-jou is conspiring to make me have a rough day, then I’m best to just accept it. Why fight the toxicity when you can just let it flow right past.

It could be an act of prescience. Maybe this is just the wake up call I need to realize some ailing element in my life. I may look back at this day in weeks to come and recognize that my bad day was the sign of some major change.

Perhaps it’s an act of observation. An opportunity to watch it, question it, examine it – but not attach to it. How very Yogi of me.

Or maybe it’s just a not-so-bad, not-so-great, not-so-terrible day and one should not waste timing writing about in a blog. And instead move on to whatever the next moment holds. Because maybe it will be joy or it will be sadness, but this current bleh moment is moments away from being in the past.

No comments:

Post a Comment